Quotes Challenge #1

I’ve been tagged by the lovely JRose at Milliways With a Pen for the Three Quotes in Three Days Challenge. This is a little tough!

posnegAt first glance, I felt this to be true, and so I pinned it. Of course, I said to myself, how can both exist at the same time? You can’t be positive if you’re negative. You can’t be a loving person if you hate somebody. But is everyone truly and so thoroughly black and white?

I think not.

*Disclaimer: There are some very black-and-white people out there, and I have the utmost respect for those who know what they feel, know what they believe, know what they want, etc., and live likewise. But personally, I am unable to be so decisive and firm. I live in something of a dark grey area.

What an individual is dealt in life will always color their outward lens. There’s no way around that. You can spend your whole life untangling the mess your life used to be — and that alone affects the way you live your life. We all carry scars.

The truth is, you can live a positive life with a negative mind. I’m cynical. I believe in the worst in people, but I also believe in the best in people. I observe humans. I’ve been hurt. And I’d be a liar if I said I’ve never hurt anyone. But that’s for a different topic.

Twelve years ago, during one of those drink-coffee-until-3am get-togethers, an older and wiser friend pulled me aside and told me, “Don’t become bitter.” At 20 years old, I didn’t know what she meant. But her words haunted me for a long time. They still do. Because ten years after she had told me that, I found myself wallowing in bitterness and anger. She had admired me for my adoration of the world. And I have since lost that wide-eyed wonder.

The world is a terrible place. I don’t expect perfection from people. But I’ve learned to see past the negative. There really are beautiful things and beautiful people in the world. But for every beautiful thing, is there not a handful of ugly and horrible things? I don’t dwell on the ugliness. But I don’t ignore it, either.

Seeing the positive isn’t going to change my negative mind. And likewise, my negative mind isn’t going to make me dismiss the positive.

This is simply untrue and misleading. I can’t yell that loud enough. Why would you voluntarily brainwash yourself to ignore the negative in life? It’s false hopes, and a terrible thing to say to someone who is hurting. Instead,

There must be a balance. I’m not saying that negatives are a good thing, but without one, you wouldn’t have the other. I appreciate all the good things in my life. I am thankful for all that I have. I adore the goodness. I detest the negative. But detesting it won’t make it go away. And the older I get, the better I can live with it. The less it will consume me as it once has.

I’m still growing, still learning, still searching for more wisdom, more knowledge, more inspiration, and more positive. Acknowledge the negative. Don’t feed it, but don’t pretend it’s not there. Learn to work with and through the negative. Know when to choose the positive over the negative. It’s not easy. I’ve been there and am still there in various ways. I accept that. And in accepting that (which is the hardest part), I can be positive.

Yes, I unpinned that original image, because I don’t feel it to be accurate (like most memes out there). Instead, I prefer this one:


In turn, I am to nominate 3 bloggers. These folks are by no means obligated to do the quote challenge! Also, the quotes need not be life-related, they could be about books, writing, anything. This first of three quote posts just so happened to be the first quote that popped into my head, and it’s a quote that really bothered me. Infact, many memes bother me.




6 responses to “Quotes Challenge #1

  1. As I get older, I tend to just let things roll off of me more. Not to say everything can just roll off but for the most part I stay pretty neutral.
    I think the idea behind the sentiment is that people think if they’re positive, positive things will happen. Law of attraction or some such.
    For me, the hardest part is being a good person, not that I don’t want to be only sometimes it’s hard to tell what the right decision is.
    At the end of the day, I don’t think your approach is negative per se. I think it’s more realistic. There isn’t anything wrong with that. The problem is when you let the darkness seep in… I think it can lead to unhappiness if you can’t see the good and the bad. You know?

    Liked by 1 person

    • You’re right; oftentimes it isn’t so simple to know what’s right or wrong. Life is made up of many different greys. This is where experience comes into play. I dislike the negative experiences I’ve had in my life, but I wouldn’t be just a tad bit more wiser if it hadn’t gone through them. I feel that knowing yourself, and knowing what makes you happy or unhappy, is tantamount to finding that ideal balance.

      And, of course, I don’t believe in the law of attraction. I don’t believe in fate, either. Everyone has a choice in what they want for themselves. You have to make it or go get it, it won’t come to you. I think that’s a concept a lot of people have somehow missed. But hey, it’s just my opinion! If there’s one statement I DO stand behind, is that perspective can change everything.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Quotes Challenge #2 – ellDimensional·

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